By John Owen

A strange thing happened in Edmonds on New Year's Day, 2009.

Some of the heartiest members of our community donned monogrammed bathrobes inside Daphne's wine and beer bar and then marched down Main Street to Brackett's Landing where, upon a signal from Brian Taylor, they raced into the frigid waters of Puget Sound.

Well, to be truthful, not all of them raced. A few stumbled, screeched to a halt, and then began to shiver. I can't remember who braved the ice bath the longest, thus earning a bottle of champagne and the title of King of the Polar Bear Splash.

But I do remember passing Daphne's on the way home. The door was locked but through the window I could see that the bar was littered with empty beer cans and discarded robes. Not a creature was stirring not even a mouse. Or a polar bear.

I initially surmised that everybody had rushed home for a hot shower.

But two days later, the door to Daphne's was still locked, the litter untouched. A week later, nothing had changed and answering my queries one of the Daphne regulars said he had heard that owner Brian Taylor had boarded a plane hours after the Polar Bear Splash and had relocated to County Cork, Ireland.

That didn't make any sense atall, atall.

Checking the Internet I established that the water at Fountainstown Beach near Cork is frigid, the shoreline is littered with stones and the bay is filled with seaweed. Compared to that scene, Brackett's Landing is Malibu Beach.

There had to be another explanation for that quick exit by all the participants from the Edmonds' New Year's Day Polar Bear Dip.

Then I seized upon a logical explanation. Taylor and all his Pied Piper followers must have fled up Main Street en masse.

They had likely been frightened out of their wits by a glimpse of one or more giant squid.

Don't laugh. Puget Sound is home to the third largest species of squid in the world. It is called Onykia Robusta. My knowledge of giant squid extends back to my childhood. It seemed that every time I glimpsed Dorothy Lamour on a movie screen she was being pulled underwater by a giant squid, firmly attached to her ankle.

If the Edmonds Polar Bears were in fact chased away by giant squid they should have recalled the motto of the true Puget Sounder. If you are confronted by giant squid, transform it into squid stew.

What I mean is that we need to turn that minus into a plus.

Loch Ness in Scotland is famous because it is supposedly the habitat of the Loch Ness Monster. Closer to home, much of the publicity drawing tourists to Kelowna Lake in British Columbia is linked to another aquatic monster, known as Ogopogo.

All we need in Edmonds is some creative advertising. If the tourists want monsters, give them monsters. Or, in this case, giant squid. I'd suggest that the Chamber of Commerce nail some shoes to our local fishing pier next to a plaque warning of the danger posed by giant squid, who sometimes reach up and jerk salmon fishermen right over the rail. Souvenir shops could begin selling photos of these ominous empty shoes.

And if we need somebody to lead this publicity campaign I'd recommend Brian Taylor, who is back on the shores of Puget Sound ready to lead this year's plunge into Puget Sound.

If youre checking his credentials you might be reminded that County Cork, Ireland, is the site of the Blarney Stone.